My Shadow Self

I am not one of those brave souls that look at their dark side. I must have a dark side, by default perhaps, but if I do, I am in absolute denial.

What does a dark side do? Where does it go? I listened to a man tell how the caterpillar resists the metamorphosis in order to awaken the cells required for the butterfly. I can’t identify. I think that’s what the gentleman was trying to achieve. I can’t imagine the process. It’s a bit like trying to read or write science fiction. Not something I can do.

Age falls on us almost imperceptibly and it’s only when night comes that I notice I am tired of being awake, not especially weary.

Silence. No television. The warm bed and time to just let go of the things. I realise I have been holding my innards too tightly.

I don’t know I am doing it until I am warm in bed. Winter is dodgy though. I don’t warm up easily. I need a hot water bottle. Have I always done this? I expect I did, but when one is young, one is bullet proof to some extent.

Visiting my Ne’ and the children.

Holly – a long stay at the doggy day care.

She’s heavy and welcome kisses are expected. I only look uncomfortable because she’s in top of me and she’s quite heavy.

I’ve changed my mind about computer games for children. It teaches cooperation and the use of words to direct your team mate. Daddy helps. Mom and I can’t help. We are not grown up with games. I was quite happy that the lad is a patient big brother while Missy is, “Oh, look there’s a butterfly!” The Lad is good at bringing her back. “Ok, you’ve seen the bird now, now double jump on the wall!” Then she makes snow angels first and then looks up and says, “I can’t find you!”

So fine motor skills, negotiating and motivating and cooperation is all part of the exercise. But they have only so much time at it and then they must play without the game.

Daddy helping.

So, at least my fears of the games has evaporated. The world is going virtual anyway. There’s no stopping it.

And, changing subject dramatically, the news media from formal to podcasts, all seem to be pushing Iran to attack Israel. Then if it happens, because thoughts become things, the podcasters will say, “We called it five years ago!” I keep thinking, forgive them Father, for they know not what they do. They are creating chaos with their need to have called it.

So, please, happy thoughts my beloveds. Think PEACE! Please.

Love and Holy Light. And Peace be with you all.